


Royal Delivery Service

by huehuehue



Series: Of Magic and Managers [3]
Category: Loki - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Norse Religion & Lore, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Asgard, Cats, Cute, Domestic Fluff, Escape, Established Relationship, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Happy Ending, Humor, Jötunheimr | Jotunheim, Married Life, POV Loki (Marvel), Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 10:38:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11804331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/huehuehue/pseuds/huehuehue
Summary: Loki is off on a very important quest.Sometimes you don't find what you seek, but what you find turns out not to be so bad, too.This story is both an AU, and a glimpse into the future, depending on whether I leave Loki and Julia a chance to fix the things that are about to go off road.Here, have a glimpse into the way their married life could be, and a nice distraction from the storyline of the “World Domination” (http://archiveofourown.org/works/9184504/chapters/20846662), where things are about to get dark.





	Royal Delivery Service

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Archy3001](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Archy3001/gifts).



_The risk was calculated, but oh boy, I am so bad at math!_

 

The heavily armed Jotunn guard stomped past the dark alcove where they were hiding. Loki waited for him to disappear behind the turn, and cautiously peeked into the passage. 

“We are so not supposed to be here,” Thor sighed behind his back.  
“Mh-m, I am aware.” Loki beckoned at his brother, and the two men tiptoed further down the hall.

Loki slid the stolen key into the hole, and the wide metal doors opened with a clang. The staircase was leading down, lit only by the glimmer of stars and the polar lights coming through the window. The grey stone of the walls and the floor was covered in rime.

Loki noticed the grimace of disapproval on Thor’s face, and chuckled.

“What have we become, brother?!” He whispered, creeping down the slippery staircase. “You, warning me of the risk…”  
“And you, acting retarded?” Thor huffed, and his low deep voice echoed in the tower, as if the two men were in a deep well. Loki hissed, a finger pressed against his lips. “Do you realize that Julia will never forgive me, if an angry Jotunn smashes your scull?”

The kitchen was close. Loki and Thor almost reached the lowest floor of the palace, and it was getting warmer with every staircase they passed. There was no more ice on the stairs nor hoarfrost on the walls, and the air became so warm that Loki felt tiny drops of sweat cover his forehead. Based on his knowledge about the life in an Aesir palace, he expected the kitchen to be empty in the middle of the night. If he was right, they'd be able to find what they seek soon, and leave unnoticed, without causing unnecessary bloodshed.

“Oh, trust me, brother, Julia is more likely to smash my skull than any Jotunn,” Loki muttered wearily, and rubbed his face. Thor hummed with disbelief.  
“Little sister has never had aggressive tendencies before.” He said strictly, although his eyes were sparkling with laughter. “Must be your bad influence.”  
“I'll watch you laugh when your wife gets pregnant,” Loki growled at Thor, and pushed the heavy kitchen door open. There was no lock - because seriously, why would there be one?!

The two brothers thoroughly checked every dark corner in the kitchen, to make sure that not a single tired scullion had decided to stay for the night and rest. When it became clear that there was not a single living soul, but them, the men relaxed. Thor snorted, and delved into a big cauldron full of stew left for the night.

“Luckily, I don't have a wife,” he said, and tasted the thick casserole.  
“Well, maybe it is time you considered getting yourself one,” Loki leaned against a kitchen chair, allowing himself for a moment of rest. The chair was too tall for him, and it almost looked as if he was resting beside a bar counter.

Thor swallowed a spoonful of casserole, and wiped his beard.

“Feels bad to suffer alone, doesn't it?” He drawled with a wide grin, and Loki stifled an urge to drown his brother in the cauldron of stew.  
“Just… let's get it over with.” He suggested. “Please?”

They still had to search the kitchen, and find a safe passage back home.

\----------

“What is it now?” Loki sighed, and turned his head to look at Julia.

His wife realized that he had caught her staring, and wrapped herself tighter in a duvet.

“Sorry. I can't sleep,” she whispered.  
“Was I breathing too loudly, again?” Loki asked, turning his head to a side. He tried to make it sound like a joke, but he felt that his voice was a little too stiff and aggressive. Julia shook her head.  
“No, I'm just a little hungry.” The girl replied with a guilty smile.

Loki grunted, and rubbed his face. He could not see the clock from the bed, but it clearly was very late. Too late for him to be awake, because the meeting with the representatives of the handicraft guilds of the glorious city of Asgard was not going to hold itself.

“We had dinner an hour before we went to bed.” He reminded his wife.

In the darkness, Loki saw Julia's lips twitch a little, and at once felt a prick of guilt. He did not mean to be hostile to her, but he hadn't slept well for several months already. 

Julia lay on her side, wrapped in a blanket, and under the covers Loki could see her heavy rounded belly. Since the moment he learned of her new state, the man got the healers to monitor his wife’s health non-stop. Although the medics kept saying that the Queen’s well-being was not at stake, Loki just couldn't stop worrying. Julia looked so clumsy and helpless to him that every single moment when she was not in front of his eyes, he kept imagining her tripping, falling off the stairs, or stretching her ankle, or getting hurt in any other possible way.

Thinking rationally, Loki realized that his panic was ill-grounded. Julia did not engage in any dangerous activities like sword-fighting, or ship-racing through the deserted neighbourhoods at night. She was a diligent pregnant woman that stayed out of trouble - in fact, the only trouble that Julia was experiencing was with picking things up from the floor, since her belly was exceptionally big already. However, it was not only her body changing as the time passed, but also her behaviour. At some point Loki realized that his sweet, smart, gentle wife was left with only four possible moods: hungry, annoyed, horny and sad.

There was that one time when Julia woke him up in the middle of the night for some amazing and unexpected sex, and then locked herself up in the bathroom crying, because Loki needed to wake up early the next morning, and she had been selfish and inconsiderate. Through the sobs and tears she also demanded a piece of meat pie, and then got angry because there was no mustard. He did not sleep at all that night...

Anyway, as unbearable as pregnancy made Julia, Loki had absolutely no excuse to be mean to her, because exactly half the blame was his.

“I am sorry, sweet bird,” he leaned on his elbow, and gently pulled Julia closer. Loki brushed the hair off her face, and reached for the hem of the duvet to cover his wife's shoulders from the coolness of the night. “What do you want, a dessert? A sandwich? I'll call for the maidens immediately.”

His wife smiled at him with gratitude, and pressed herself against his side. Her gaze became dreamy, slightly blurred.

“Remember those gingerbreads we ate in Jotunheim?” She asked.

Of course he didn't. They had visited Jotunheim more than half a year ago. A short stay lasted for no more than a couple of hours, but it was a huge success of the Aesir diplomacy since the two Realms were almost at war.

His two older brothers - Byleistr and Helblindi - were gigantic, blue, cold, and very unhappy to see him. Loki had a certain idea what could have been the reason: plotting, betraying and killing the father that they all three happened to share. Or, maybe, it could have been the overall hostile and violent nature of the ice giants, he could never know for sure...

In any way, Loki was so focused on leading the negotiations and minding every single word that escaped his mouth, that he did not remember what the food tasted like.

“I wonder what spices they put inside,” Julia mused, slightly drumming her fingers against his chest. “Do you know the recipe?”  
“No, I don't,” Loki replied with sincere regret. “It is not that when an ice giant baby is born, he has the secret knowledge of traditional recipes. I am sorry, sweet bird.”

With a sorrowful little sigh Julia tucked her palm under her cheek.

“I want those gingerbreads,” she whispered sadly, and closed her eyes, trying to fall back asleep.

Loki lasted for a minute or so. He had two options: either kidnap one of the Jotunn cooks and force him to make traditional pastry, or find the gingerbreads that are ready for consumption. In either way, the enterprise required a visit to the alien Realm almost at war with Asgard.

The risk was high, because getting caught would most likely mean death for him - especially considering his past crimes against the inhabitants of Jotunheim. Was Loki going to take the risk? The answer was absolutely positive.

And he knew the right person to keep him company.

“I'll see what I can do,” he smiled at Julia, and got up from the bed.

And this was how he appointed himself the royal delivery boy.

\----------

Looking back at his seemingly flawless plan, Loki had to admit that it could have been a little too bald. 

Thor was right. If Julia ever learned that he had raided the Royal Castle of Jotunheim in order to satisfy her food cravings, she would surely be willing to kill him. But for that, she would have to stand in a rather long line, right after the enraged Jotunn guards who had tracked down the invisible trespassers.

It was either bad luck, or lack of sleep that made Loki exhausted, or the frost, but the spell delaying the alarm wore off too fast. The whole palace was now filled with a steady buzzing sound, the danger tocsin ringing on every floor they had passed on their way into the kitchen. 

The good thing was that Loki and Thor were still invisible to the sentinels, but it was only a matter of time before the guards would break through the kitchen door. Then, the two of them would surely get trudged and crushed to death by the guards simply taking a look around.

Loki imagined all the nasty things that the Jotunns would do to his dead body before sending it back to Asgard, and realized that it would make Julia sad and extremely stressed out. Therefore, he had no other choice but not to get caught.

Thor suddenly laughed out loud and swung the hammer in the air, getting ready for a fight.

“Just like the old times, right?” The God of Thunder sneered at him. “Since your plan didn't work, let's try mine: as soon as these fuckers break through the door, we smash them, we kill them all, and we get back home.”  
“What an ingenious plan!” Loki cried out with fake admiration. The doors shook under a heavy blow of what sounded and felt like a battering ram, and the two men winced. “In case you didn't know, every single Jotunn has an ability to control ice and form it into weapons of his choice, it is not just me. They have the high ground here, and there are too many of them. We are most likely to die if we try to fight back.”  
“What are you suggesting, then?” Thor sighed, his voice slightly muffled as he chewed on something. Loki turned around, and saw the blonde man tear a piece off a small round scone. Thor stood beside an enormous clay jar. “M-mm, Julia is right, it does taste good. I think it might be the cinnamon and mint, and a little aniseed…”

It was exactly what they had been looking for. Loki shot his brother an angry glare, and attempted to take the gingerbread away from him.

“Stop eating, and pack as much as you can find!” He growled. “Quick!”

Thor opened his satchel, and kicked the heavy jar full of gingerbreads. The clay vessel fell on the floor and cracked. The man crouched beside it, throwing handfuls of scones into his bag, while Loki kept pacing the kitchen back and forth, searching for something on the floor.

“Done!” Thor called for him. “Are we leaving, or what?”

Instead of replying, Loki sharply pulled on the grid covering a ventilation hole in the floor. The metal bars bent with a screech as he tore the grid out, together with several small pieces of stone.

“You are useful, after all,” Thor huffed, and approached the hole. “Um… Where exactly are we going?”  
“Down.” Loki replied, and nervously glanced at the shaking door. “I've been shown the plan of this castle by one of the spies. There is a prison on the floor below us, it is even hotter in there than in the kitchen - the Jotunns consider high temperature a torture. In the caves below the dungeon level there is a secret passage between the worlds. I don't know to which Realm it leads, but it is our only way to escape the palace without bloodshed.”

The boards of the door cracked, and one of the Jotuns eased his hand through the slit to lift the heavy bar lock. Rime started to spread over the wooden boards and the kitchen walls.

“I like your plan,” Thor said quickly, and jumped down into the ventilation hole, pressing the bag of stolen gingerbreads tightly against his chest.

\----------

They raced along the dark never-ending corridor, with metal cages to the left and right. In some of the cells Loki noticed exhausted, motionless bodies of the outlaws. The air was too hot and dry for the Jotunns to draw the liquid out of it and turn it to ice; and Loki felt that the temperature was affecting him, too. Shining white spots started to blur his vision, and the man almost tripped and crushed into the bars a couple of times; his clothes were dripping with sweat.

Now Loki knew that he hated saunas.

The corridor ended, and the trespassers ended up in front of a solid wall of black stone. Loki leaned against it to catch a breath, and coughed, trying to get rid of a burning sensation in his lungs.

“Where is that secret passage?” Thor asked impatiently as he kept touching every single uneven piece of stone in the wall in search of a hidden lever.  
“The passage is under the dungeons.” Loki panted. “We must go deeper.”  
“Deeper?!” Thor stared at him with sheer surprise. “Can you even walk, brother?”  
“Yes, I am fine.” Loki hissed stubbornly. “Under the layer of ice that covers the surface, the crust of this planet is very thin. There are caves filled with fire and hot magma just beneath us. The passage must be there.”  
“Are you… sure about that?” 

There was rumble and a heavy thud, and the sound of an opening door. The pursuers could not follow the two men through a small ventilation hole, but they were close already. Thor cursed, grunted with effort, and crushed the hammer into the floor of the dungeon.

Loki closed his eyes and slid down onto the ground, feeling the whole dungeon slightly shake with the rhythmic blows of Thor’s hammer and wondering, if his brother’s efforts would be enough to make the whole castle collapse. Small pieces of stone were flying in the air and scratching his face. When the man felt Thor shake him on the shoulders, it took him much effort to look up.

“Get up, brother.” Thor was breathing heavily, his face covered in dust and sweat.

On second or third attempt Loki stood straight, and slowly headed towards the big uneven hole in the floor. He heavily sat at the edge, and jumped down, straight into the dark cave.

It felt as if he had ended up in the depth of hell - not the frozen Helheim, but the Midgardian Catholic hell full of fire and suffering, and souls of the sinners paying off their wrongdoings. It was more or less what Loki felt like, the dry air of the Jotunn prison above them resembling a soft breath of spring in comparison to the fierce devastating heat of the underground cave.

When his eyes got used to the mirk, Loki saw that the darkness in the cavern was not impenetrable. There were tall dripstone columns supporting the ceiling, bizarre cave crystals, and thick puddles of hot magma.

The secret passage was nowhere to be seen.

“Perfect plan, dumbass!” Thor turned to him with a snarl. The man's face was glistening with sweat, and his hair and beard were curling in the hot temperature. “Getting roasted alive in the cave beneath your dead father's castle is exactly how I wanted to die!”  
“Shut up!” Loki snapped at him, straining his eyes to see through the rippling hot air. “It is here somewhere, it must be here…”  
“What are we even looking for?!”

Their clothes were starting to smolder. The thin brownish crust under their feet cracked, and spurts of fire licked their boots.

At this moment, Loki finally saw what he had been looking for.

“Over there!” He cried out and stretched his arm forward. Thor jerked away with a displeased grimace, and rubbed his nose.  
“I only see clouds of vapour.”  
“This is it. The difference in temperature creates the haze and fog.” Loki panted, desperately fighting for a breath. “It is much colder in the place where this passage leads.”  
“Works for me.” 

The two men looked at each other, and simultaneously leaped forward. They jumped over a stream full of brownish lava, and dove into a crack between the Realms, disappearing in the thick vapour.

The world around them spun, the cold of the unknown destination place mixing with the heat of the underground cave. They were tossed around like two leaves caught in a fast current, until the swirling strand spat them out.

Loki and Thor landed with a thud and a splash, face down into the wet mud. The dirt was pleasantly cold, and Loki almost buried his face deeper in it. With a moan he rolled onto his back, and met his brother's angry glare. Thor almost had no eyebrows left, and there was a fresh burn mark on his left cheek - and Loki wondered if he looked the same.

“Fucking idiot,” Thor moaned. “Stupid Jotunn fucker... You are the Allfather, the duty before your subjects is more important than your private needs. You cannot risk your life like this!”  
“I can do what I want,” Loki whispered with effort. It was still hard to breathe for him, but he was feeling much better already.  
“I'm gonna punch you, hard,” Thor warned him, and spat out the dirt. He clenched his hand into a fist and attempted to wave it in the air, but couldn't.  
“Fine.”

Both did not move for a longer while. Loki closed his eyes, feeling the drops of cold rain caress the burnt sore skin of his face.

“I once read a book about all races that inhabit the Nine Realms, you know,” Thor grumbled in a tired detached voice.  
“Once, you say.” Loki sighed, pretty sure about where it was going. “Was it the only time you held a book in your hands?...”  
“The book said that Jotunns are extremely dumb creatures.” Thor interrupted him. “Would you agree with this statement, brother?”

Loki hissed at him, but said nothing.

He kind of deserved it.

“Stop being a nuisance. We are alive, and we have those gingerbreads, don't we?” Loki slowly braced himself up from the ground. 

Thor said nothing in response.

“Don't we?” Loki repeated.

Without getting up, Thor moved his hand to feel the ground beside him, and then checked his pockets.

“I could have lost the bag.”  
“What?!”  
“I lost the bag.” Thor corrected himself. “I must have let it slip through my fingers when we jumped through the passage.”

Loki closed his eyes and took a deep slow breath. It was the moment when the exhaustion of the past several months hit him at once, and he felt the aching of the fresh burns on his skin ten times stronger.

“Norns,” he sighed.  
“We are not going back,” Thor warned him. “Don't even think of it!”  
“I know, I know.” Loki wiped the mud off his face. “Shit! I wonder where we ended up.”  
“Somewhere rainy,” Thor suggested, and held on to Loki’s hand stretched out to help him get up from the ground. “Must be Midgard.”

They stood in the middle of a construction site, surrounded by excavators covered with the canvas for the night. Raindrops were drumming over the tin barracks and the equipment, and tiny streams of muddy brownish water were flowing towards a big deep pit with pipes.

“If I punch your face, little sister will be sad.” Thor mused.  
“She is very likely to be,” Loki agreed with him.  
“Consider yourself lucky, then.” Thor sighed, and walked towards the empty space in the middle of the construction site, viscid mud sticking to his boots. “You are an irresponsible idiot, brother, and you do deserve a good beating. But I don't want to upset Julia, and I might forgive you after a pint or two… or five.”  
“Sure. Thor?”  
“And it’d better be a pint of something good. Your treat.” Thor said in a menacing tone.  
“Got it. Thor, do you hear this?” Loki froze in his place, alertly turning his head around.  
“No.”  
“Then shut up and listen!”

A quiet squeal was coming from somewhere very close - a desperate sound of someone crying for help without hope of anyone hearing the plea. Something was moving in a deep ditch left by the wheels of an excavator - something that looked like a tiny animal crawling in the wet mud. Loki moved closer, and crouched beside the strange creature.

It was a cub of some animal - and from the way it placed its unruly paws on the ground, Loki could say that the creature was no more than several days old. He cautiously poked it with his finger, and the cub staggered and meowed.

“It must be a small cat.” Loki picked the animal up from the ground to examine it closely.  
“A kitten?”  
“Mh-m.”

The kitten’s thin fur was covered in a layer of mud so thick that one wouldn't be able to tell the colour. One of its eyes was not fully open, and the cub was shaking with both the cold and the effort, clutching to Loki’s fingers with its soft claws.

“Just one cub?” Thor asked.

Loki looked around, wondering where the animal could have come from. The cub couldn't have traveled far. The Asgardian approached the nearest barrack, and peeked into the half-open door.

Cold water was almost reaching his ankles. In the corner of an empty premise Loki saw a pile of rags, and several small bodies curled up in the water, all completely still.

The cat itself was nowhere to be seen. Loki shut the door behind his back.

“Yes, just one.”

Thor brushed the wet hair away from his face, and clicked his tongue.

“It won't survive till morning.”

Loki stared at the little helpless creature he was holding, and with every following second he realized that he couldn't place it back onto the cold ground and walk away, leaving the cub to meet its certain death. Maybe it would last an hour, maybe two, but Thor was absolutely right, the animal wouldn't make it through the night...

“If it lives through the ascension, it might as well survive till morning,” Loki decisively placed the kitten into a deep pocket on his chest. Thor’s brows flew up, and he opened and shut his mouth several times without a single sound escaping his lips.  
“What will Julia say?” He finally breathed out.  
“Julia brought her singing chicken to my chambers without my permission.” Loki snarled at his brother. “Let's go home.”

\----------

Loki opened the door of his chambers, when the darkness of the night started to fade into the greyish dusk of an early autumn morning.

It must have been the kitten’s lucky day. Not only did it survive a journey in the strands of cosmic energy, but it also fell asleep in Loki’s pocket. The creature woke up half the way to the chambers and started to meow, opening a toothless maw wide. The slumber must have allowed the cub to recuperate, because now its cries were exceptionally loud.

“Julia?” Loki wiped the soles of his boots at the door. “I brought you something… It is not edible, I'm afraid…”  
“That's fine, I ate soup just after you left.” Julia cried back from the bedroom, and the man heard the approaching steps of her bare feet. “Please don't be angry with me, but I am feeling so awkward right now… After you left, I realized that I don't want those gingerbreads anymore. In fact, the very thought of them made me puke - I mean, the smell as I remember it seems so disgusting right now, and… Oh, my sweet baby Jesus!” 

Julia froze in the doorway with her mouth open wide. She gulped for air, as her eyes travelled up and down her husband's silhouette. Loki awkwardly shifted on his feet, and adjusted the burnt and dirty coat he was wearing.

“Where the fuck have you been?!” Julia whined, and leaned against the doorframe. Loki tensed up, ready to leap forward and catch her, would there be such need. “Loki, are you… Are you all right?!”  
“Yes, I am absolutely fine,” he said as firmly as possible, hoping that the sound of his calm voice would be convincing for Julia. “Alive and well, see?”

His wife took a deep slow breath, and decisively marched forward. She grabbed a heavy vase on the way, and Loki moved back and then stepped to a side, so that a table would separate them. 

“Really?! Are you also willing to give me a punch?” He sighed. “Is it a new game?! You'd better take your place in line, right after Thor…”  
“Pregnant women have a priority lane in every supermarket!” Julia grunted.  
“I don't think that it works the same with punching.” Loki said. “Please, don't strain yourself, sweet bird, I don't want you to get tired, or nervous…”  
“I won't be nervous if you tell me where you've been to!” Julia roared, and aimed the heavy vase at her husband's head, but cringed. Loki's heart sank as he watched his wife slowly put the vase down, and wrap one arm around her belly. He darted towards her, and supported Julia in a tight embrace.

And at this moment, the kitten in his pocket woke up again, and screamed.

“What is this?!” Julia whispered, her breathing fast and shallow.

Loki slowly let go of her, and reached into the pocket on his chest. He cautiously took the kitten out. The cub was meowing and blindly nuzzling the man’s fingers in search for the nourishment. 

“I found it at a construction site, it was the only one left.” He explained uneasily. “This is where all the mud comes from. I told you, I am absolutely fine.”

Julia reached out to touch the creature.

“My God…” She whispered. “It is so small! Must be a week old, ten days, tops…”

She suddenly shook off Loki's hand wrapped around her waist, and darted towards the writing desk. The man stared at his wife, confused and alarmed.

“What are you doing?” He asked when Julia handed him a piece of paper covered in her hesitant scribbles. “What is this?”  
“This is the address of the vet.” She replied. “It's the only twenty four-seven that I know of, I drove Barbara there once, when her cat got sick. The poor thing must be starving, and they have milk…”

Loki did not protest when she took the kitten away from him. He trusted Julia with holding the tiny cub much more, than he trusted himself.

“There is plenty of milk in the kitchens.” He reminded her.

Julia laughed, and shook her head.

“You are lucky to have me, otherwise this kitten wouldn't have a chance,” she said. “Most cats are intolerant to dairy, they can get terrible food poisoning if someone feeds them milk or cream. At the vet's they usually sell powdered milk low on lactose. Go and get it.”  
“Anything else?”

Julia bit her lip.

“Well, it is still too early for a shitbox…” She mused. “That will be all. Hurry up.”

\----------

He was gone for an hour or so. On his way back, Loki expected to see Julia with her eyes wet, and the tiny hungry creature dead. It was a sad, but logical ending that he was prepared for.

Instead, he saw a carton box on the floor, with a bed warmer placed inside it. Julia was having a yogurt, seated beside the box and diligently watching over the kitten. The cub itself kept crawling back and forth, ramming the walls of the container with admirable persistence.

“Finally,” Julia took the container with milk away from him, and tore off a leaflet with the instruction and the feeding chart. “We've been starving!”

Loki decided not to ask, who exactly she had been referring to. He watched his wife open the cover, and put two spoonfuls of powdered milk into a glass of warm water. Julia hummed something under her breath as she thoroughly mixed the fluid, and poured a little bit of mixture into a syringe. As Loki watched her prepare the formula, he suddenly realized, how much he had changed through the past two years. A year or two ago he would have indifferently walked past the helpless cub crawling in a cold muddy ditch. But also, a year or two ago he hadn't been expecting a child of his own, a little creature that could have been just as helpless if he or Julia died...

“He chose the worst moment to join.” Julia crooned, and brushed her finger against the kitten’s back. She had somehow managed to clean the cub from the dirt, and Loki saw that it had a coat of pale cream color. “Little children are terrible when it comes to handling animals. They pull on tails, they chew their ears… My corgi used to hide upstairs in my room when Alex learned to walk…”  
“The creature did not choose anything.” Loki huffed haughtily. “It is here only thanks to my mercy.”  
“You know nothing.” Julia replied very seriously. “It is the pets that choose us, not the other way round. I remember when my parents and I went to buy a corgi: there were many puppies running around, but one of them peed all over my lap.”  
“And?...” Loki urged her, unable to see the connection.  
“And,” Julia rolled her eyes, “he was the one. We took him.”

The man let out a surprised laugh. 

“A very interesting story.” He replied, and reached out to touch the kitten’s fur. It was silky, so thin that one could see the pink skin through it. “Should I pee all over you to make a statement, my love?”  
“I think that you already made a pretty clear statement,” Julia tapped on her rounded belly. “What are you going to call the cat?”

Loki shrugged. 

“Do I have to give it a name?” He asked.  
“Well, coming up with a name is an important part of getting yourself a pet. It's a boy, by the way.” Julia looked up at him, and smiled.

It was not something Loki had planned for.

“You do not mind?” He noticed the way Julia's brows flew up in surprise, and clarified. “I found the little creature in the dirt, it might be contagious. Besides, I wouldn't want it to be bothering you at night. I could give it to the servants, and supply them with powdered milk. Or, I could…”  
“Keep it?” Julia suggested. “Just keep it, Loki. Cats are fun, as soon as they open their eyes, start to walk straight, and learn to use the shitbox. You’ll see. They are almost like children.”  
“Are they?” Loki huffed, watching the tiny fluffy bean yawn and curl up in a pile of some soft greenish material - he recognized one of his old tunics.  
“Yes, but a feline lives no more than twenty years, so, a cat will surely be less tiring than a baby.” Julia saw him hesitate, and caught her husband’s hand in hers. “Look, we have three months left. Let’s consider it a rehearsal.”

The kitten woke up and squealed, as if to back her point.

“Feeding time!” Julia cried out happily, and handed to Loki the syringe full of milk. “You do it, you are his daddy. Just, do it slowly, you don’t want to drown him.”

Loki grimaced, but sat down on the floor, and obediently picked up the kitten. He placed the cub on his open palm, and brought the syringe closer to its open maw. The hungry creature caught the nozzle, and the man gently pressed the plunger with his fingers to let the milk drip into the kitten’s mouth. Loki felt his wife sit down on the bed beside him, and slightly leaned closer, pressing his side against her legs.

“You could make a model cat lady,” Julia praised him. Loki was so rapt with the task, that he did not react to her words at once. “Don't forget about the massage.”  
“Massage?” The man put away the empty syringe.  
“Yes, massage,” the girl repeated. “Cat mother licks the kitten’s butt after it has eaten, in order to stimulate the release of faeces.”

Loki almost let go of the cub, and Julia giggled. The expression on his face was a mixture of shock and disgust. 

“I won't lick the kitten.” He said firmly. “Don't even think of it.”

Julia blinked, then snorted, and then laughed out loud.

“You are one crazy cat daddy!” she panted, holding onto her belly and slightly swaying back and forth. Her face was flushed with pink. “You don't actually lick the kitten, you use a warm damp towel to wipe it! How can you live for two thousand years, and be so ignorant?!”  
“There are no cats in Asgard,” Loki reminded her, and put the kitten into the box, beside the warmer. “I mean, there haven't been any, before.”  
“Does it mean that you are keeping him?” Julia asked him hopefully, and bit the inside of her cheek. Loki knew that she was trying to keep the smile from showing, because she did not want him to think that she was laughing at him for acting so soft - and again, a year or two ago he would have probably cared. He did not care - not anymore.

The man shrugged, and reached out to touch his wife’s belly.

“A rehearsal, just like you said.” He smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe, a tiny author's closing note :)  
> We are getting close to the part of the plot, that will be very unpleasant for me to write, and probably even less pleasant for you to read. This is why I am doing this take on both fluff and one-shots. Hope you are not left disappointed.
> 
> @Archy - please consider it a delayed Happy Birthday piece :)


End file.
